Almost like Christmas in July

Everyone has there favorite time of year. Some people live all year long looking forward to now, because they can't get enough of the holiday season. For others, they live for the summer. Others still say their favorite time of year is late November, surrounding turkey day. For me, the best time of year is late April. Why you may ask. Well the answer is, every year in late April my favorite event takes place. That event would be the NFL Draft. Thats right, the NFL Draft is my favorite event of the year.

Because this is my favorite event of the year, I think it is never too early to start to predict how April's draft will turn out. For me, releasing my first round mock in December, is kind of like those crazy people who start celebrating Christmas in July !!!

Now, some of you who follow football are going to complain that the definite draft order has yet to be set, so how can there be a mock draft. We still have Juniors who may declare as well. That is why this is an initial mock. There will be more. For this mock draft, the following rules were used.

1. The draft order is based on how it would look right now. This could changed based on week 17 results and playoff results. This draft is based on the order right now.

2. Juniors who have already declared are included in the list. In addition, so are Juniors who I think should or will declare eligibility. The Juniors will be noted with an asterisks.

So without further pomp, here is my initial first round mock draft for the 2007 NFL Draft.

1. Detroit Lions -Brady Quinn, QB, Notre Dame
The lions really don't have a QB need, and would best be served to trade down to collect picks, but if they stay, choosing Quinn will at least give the fans in Detroit some hope for next season.

2. Oakland Raiders - Troy Smith, QB, Ohio State
The Raiders really need a QB, and would love to get Quinn. If the Lions listen to trade offers, expect the Raiders to be on the phone. If Quinn is gone, the Raiders will select the Heisman Trophy winner.

3. Tampa Bay Bucs - Ted Ginn*, WR, Ohio State
The Bucs have had trouble putting points on the board all season, and with Chris Simms to be returning as the starting QB, they will want to surround him with weapons. Ted Ginn is a Charles Woodson type athlete, and he will be a solid compliment to the aging Joey Galloway.

4. Houston Texans - Joe Thomas, OT, Wisconsin
The Texans have struggled to get it right since comming into the league, but this year, they will finally get smart and get QB David Carr (or whoever is there via free agency) some protection. Thomas is the best O-Lineman to come out since Orlando Pace.

5. Cleveland Browns - Adrian Peterson*, RB, Oklahoma
I had expected the Browns to be better this year after a good off season last year. Unfortunately the injury bug bit the Browns hard, and now they have the chance to add their franchise running back.

6. Arizona Cardinals - Levi Brown, OT, Penn State
The Cards have lots of talent, so their poor performance is somewhat perplexing. They still need help on the line, and I expect to see Brown put up big numbers at the combine and shoot up the board.

7. St. Louis Rams - LeMarr Woodley, LB, Michigan
The Rams were run all over all year by any team with even a decent run game. Woodley is a beast at backer. Alexander, Gore, and James are not going to be excited about this.

8. Washington Redskins - Quentin Moses, DE, Georgia
The Skins have not gotten after the opposing QB very well this year. Moses can rush the QB. A match made in heaven? I think so.

9. Green Bay Packers - Leon Hall, CB, Michigan
The Pack overachieved a bit this year, but it does not hide their numerous holes. The secondary needs a young playmaker, and Leon Hall will play well alongside former Wolverine, Charles Woodson.

10. San Francisco 49ers - Dewayne Jarrett*, WR, USC
The Niners made good progress this year, but Alex Smith still needs more targets. Two very good options should be on the board at this point, but expect the Niners to stay at home and choose Jarrett out of USC.

11. Carolina Panthers - JeMarcus Russell*, QB, LSU
QB Jake is starting to get up there in years, and backup Chris Weinke may actually be older. Unless the brass really believes in former Louisville standout Stefan Lefors, Russell will get the call.

12. Tennessee Titans - Gaines Adams, DE, Clemson
Now that Vincanity has swept Nashville, the Titans will look to get a pass rush going. Gaines Adams will fit the bill.

13. Minnesota Vikings - Paul Posluzny, LB, Penn St
Minnesota has a few directions they could go with this pick, but right now I expect the team to pair big Paul with last year's selection Chad Greenway to solidify the defense for years to come.

14. Miami Dolphins - Calvin Johnson*, WR, Georgia Tech
The Phins have not progressed as far as everyone thought they would have, but they seem confident that Daunte will be fine to take the helm next year. Giving him a target like Johnson makes the Dolphins dangerous.

15. Buffalo Bills - Michael Griffin, S, Texas
Like Michael Huff before him, Griffin is a playmaker from the Texas secondary. Buffalo could use a guy like him to take some pressure off of Nate Clements.

16. Pittsburgh Steelers - Antoine Cason*, CB, Arizona
Pittsburgh's secondary was exposed this year, and getting a primetime corner has to be a priority. Cason is an athletic, tough corner and will fit well in the Steel City.

17. Kansas City Chiefs - Jeff Samardzija, WR, Notre Dame
This team is in need of a prime time player at wide out badly. Dante Hall and Eddie Kennison are good, but not great. Samardzija is as athletic as any of the recievers in the draft, and will give Green a real target for his swan song.

18. Atlanta Falcons - Patrick Willis, LB, Ole Miss
When the Falcons had a healthy Jon Abraham rushing off the edge, the team look very good. He will be back next year, healthy, and with Willis joining the LB corps, the defense can be scary, good.

19. Jacksonville Jaguars - Victor Abimiri, DE, Notre Dame
The Jags could go OL here, but I think they will aim to rebuild the once mighty defensive front. Abimiri will help them pressure opposing passers, and could be a difference maker for the Jags.

20. Cincinnati Bengals - HB Blades, LB, Pitt
The Bengals, could go D-Line here, but it seems that David Pollack's career may be over. If this is true, a spark plug like Blades will give this defense some attitude. Come to think of it, maybe attitude is not what the Bengals need.

21. New York Jets - Marshawn Lynch, RB, California
The Jets could plug a few holes here, and if a top notch pass rusher falls to them, they may pull the trigger. Leon Washington did an admirable job this year, but he is not the long term answer. Lynch is the second best back on the board, and will do very well with Gang Green.

22. New York Giants - Tim Crowder, DE, Texas
This offseason, the Giants could be saying goodbye to Barber, Toomer, and Strahan. No slight to Toomer or Tiki, but replacing Iron Mike will have to be the first task at hand.

23. Denver Broncos - Alan Branch*, DT, Michigan
Alan Branch is really intriguing prospect. First off, he could stay a Wolverine afor another year. The other think is he has top first round talent. Seriously, he could go much higher, but I think DT's will slip this year, and the Broncos will benefit from a steal this late in Round 1.

24. New England Patriots (from Seattle) - LaRon Landry, S, LSU
With two first round pick, the Pats will begin by adressing their thin secondary. Landry is a stud and could easily go higher. If he falls this far, watch Brilliant Bill snap him up.


25. Dallas Cowboys - Justin Blalock, OL, Texas
Dallas lost Larry Allen last year. Now they need someone to protect the new franchise in Tony Romo. Blalock can play multiple spots on the line, and will look good with his star.

26. Philadelphia Eagles - Reggie Nelson, S, Florida
Michael Lewis, it appears, has forgotten how to play football. His fall from pro bowl status to backup is scary. Add the SEC champion's best playmaker to replace him and Phily will be in good shape.

27. New England Patriots - Robert Meachem*, WR, Tennessee
It seems that even Tom Brady need options to throw to to win games. Enter Meachem. He was the Vols leading receiver, and will be a big, strong, fast option for Brady.

28. Indianapolis Colts - Frank Okam*, DT, Texas
The Colts would be good... if they played defense. Booger is snot the answer, and Corey Simon may come back, but no one knows for sure. Okam will help slow down the opposing rush attack.

29. New Orleans Saints - Darrelle Revis*, CB, Pitt
What an incredible turn around for the Saints. Adding a coverage demon like Revis will ensure that next season the Saints will be even better.

30. Baltimore Ravens - Michael Bush*, RB, Louisville
This is a stretch pick because it is very likely Bush will return to the 'Ville and make a Heisman run next year. Should he come out though, the Ravens could use a guy like him to spell Jamal Lewis.

31. Chicago Bears - Brian Brohm*, QB, Louisville
Like Bush, Brohm could very well wind up back in school. If he does in fact come out, the Bears will select him to replace the floundering Rex Grossman. That's right. It is goodbye Rexy. Brohm will give the Bears a super offense to compliment their superbowl defense.

32. San Diego Chargers - Aaron Sears, OL, Tennessee
After winning the superbowl, the chargers could find themselves with more holes then they currently have as others around the league cherry pick their talent. But assuming things are as they are now, the Bolts could look Wide Out, but will instead choose to strengthen the O-Line.

A site after my own heart

As many of you, my loyal readers, know, I am a stickler about customer service. I really do not know where this pet peeve developed from, but seriously, I absolutely loath organizations that do not treat the customer correctly. I always figure, if I am going to spend my hard earned money somewhere, the business better treat me well. On the flip side of the same coin, if a group provides excellent customer service, I will usually go out of my way to patronize their business. Sometimes, even going as far a spending more money for the same product, but superior, reliable customer service.

One of my new customer service gripes is having to talk to machines. Let me give you an example. A few months back, I recieved an advertisement in the mail to switch my cable service to Verizon. This, in addition to their FIOS high speed internet seemed to be a good deal, so I called the number on the ad. I was connected directly with a salesperson, who proceeded to sell me on making the switch. Fast forward to last week, and I am having problems with my new FIOS internet going dead on me at random times. I call the service number, and I am put into a phone system where I have to enter various pieces of information into a computer. The system even went as far as trying to have the computer diagnose my problem (olf course it failed). Needles to say, it was quite frustrating. I hate speaking to machines. I would have been much happier to speak with a customer service representative.

Now please do not read this as an indictment of Verizon and their customer service. Instead, I am complaining about companies trying to save money by sacrificing on customer service, which as we all know, is partially the personal touch. Finally, there is a website who, like me, can think of many ways they would rather spend their time than speaking with a machine. What they did was compile a database of corporations around our nation, and ways of shortcutting their phone systems to speak directly with a person. Seriously, what a wonderful idea. Now, next time I need to speak with Verizon, or anyone else for that matter, I just look them up on this web site and I get to speak with a person. How nice.

So without further hype, I introduce to you all, the newest Friend of the Abstract, GetHuman. If you are interested in checking out GetHuman (and I know you are), simply click on the link GetHuman under the Friends of the Abstract section of the blog. For those of your reading this via feed reader or email, just click on one of the GetHuman links in this post.

So, here are the instructions:
1. Go to GetHuman
2. Enjoy
3. Come back here and let everyone know of your experience

Happy New Year to All... (and Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, and Good Kwanza to some)

The following Public Service Announcements have been brought to you by the number "22" (as in the number of days since my last post) and the word "sorry" (as in what I am for not having posted in aforementioned number of days).

I want to wish all of my loyal (dwindling but loyal) readership a happy holiday season. Now that the jolly fat guy has come and gone, I hope you have been left with some new gifts that will bring you some enjoyment (I know I did !!!).

Furthermore, I implore you all to go out this weekend and have a highly imbibed festive time, but please be safe. For, should you fail to follow my most recent request, you will undoubtedly miss the "Best and Worst of 2006" post which will be coming soon.

Speaking of "Best and Worst of 2006", please nominate the someone (or something) in the following categories:

Best Movie of the Year
Worst Movie of the Year
Best Song of the Year
Worst Song of the Year (A.K.A. "Please turn this fuckin' song off before I shoot myself)
Best Gift I received this Year
Worst Gift I received this Year (A.K.A "The Gravy Boat Gift" in honor of a friend)
Best Surprise of the Year
Worst Surprise of the Year
Person of the Year (famous or not, doesn't matter)
Dunce of the Year (infamous or not, doesn't matter)

Winners of the prestigious "Raised Thumb" awards (Best of's) and the "Raised Middle Finger" awards (Worst of's) will be announced in the "Best and Worst of 2006" upcoming post.

Until then, Happy New Year to all !!!!

How could so many names get it so wrong?

Ok, so now that the holiday season is smack upon us, we are going to be inundated with Santa, gifts, hallmark, and more. We get to turn on our favorite radio stations and we get to hear nothing but Deck the Halls and Jingle Bells. As Charlie Brown would say, Arrrghhh.

Now I am not trying to steal Ebeneezer's day job (although I could use one right now), but I can only handle so much Christmas spirit. It was only recently that I understood what could drive two fat guys dressed liked candy canes to get into a belly bumping match over "Christmas spirit" in the old Shadowood lobby. Seriously, enough is enough. It seems now-a-days, the turkey is not even stuffed and I am forced to watch yet another musician put out their rendition of the old holiday classics for all of us to suffer to (although this year did give me pause when the artist was Bette "only Barbara Streisand is more Jewish than me" Midler).

So what is a nice Jewish boy like me to do to escape all of these holiday wonderments? The movies!!! Thank god for motion pictures. I can get away by going to the theater and catching some pretty good shows, since the holiday season is a great time for good movies to be released. Starting on the Wednesday leading up to Thanksgiving and running all the way until the final "fa la la" Hollywood will be there to keep a simple boy like me entertained. Sure, I do get subjected to posters promoting Tim Allen's next Santa Claus flick, but I can certainly ignore them on my way to seeing some truly great pictures.

Now, each year I look forward to escaping the "holiday cheer" by heading into a cinema and losing myself in great film. So as I know you can all imagine, I was very pumped when I found out that kicking things off for us during this holiday season was Bobby. I was hoping that Emilio Estevez's tribute to Robert F. Kennedy was going to be something we could compare with Oliver Stone's tribute to the Senator's big brother in his film, JFK.

Then after taking one look down the cast list of this film, I knew I was going to be thrilled. Seriously, my new favorite trivia question is, "Name three Hollywood Icons not in this film." This film was written and directed by Emilio Estevez, who may be best know for being Charlie Sheen's eldest son, but has numerous acting credits including; The Breakfast Club, Young Guns, Men at Work (which he also wrote and Directed), and the whole Mighty Ducks series. Then the casting group started picking directly from Hollywood's current and former "A" list. They hired Emmy winner, Harry Belafonte; teen idol, Nick Cannon; Oscar nominee Laurence Fishburne (Whats Love Got to Do With It, The Matrix Trilogy, Boyz n the Hood); Heather Graham (Boogie Nights, Austin Powers); 2-time Emmy winner and 4-time Emmy nominee, Oscar winner and 4-time Oscar nominee, Sir Anthony Hopkins (Silence of the Lambs, Meet Joe Black); 1-time Oscar winner, 4-time Emmy winner and 8-time Emmy nominee Helen Hunt (As good as it Gets, Mad About You); teen idol Joshua Jackson (The Skulls, Dawson's Creek); teen idol Ashton Kutcher (The Butterfly Effect, Punk'd, That 70's Show); teen idol Lindsay Lohan (Mean Girls, The Parent Trap); Oscar nominee, William H. Macy (Fargo, Seabiscuit); 2-time Golden Globe nominee, and 1-time Emmy nominee, Demi Moore (Ghost, A Few Good Men); Emmy nominee, Freddy Rodriguez (Six Feet Under); Emmy winner, Golden Globe winner, and 2-time SAG winner, Charlie Sheen (The West Wing, The American President); teen idol Christian Slater (Pump up the Volume, Interview with a Vampire); Emmy award winner, Golden Globe winner, Oscar nominee, Sharon Stone (Casino, Basic Instinct); and SAG winner, Elijah Wood (Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Deep Impact).

A quick review for those of you who may have gotten lost. This film's cast boasts the following achievements: 28 Emmy Award nominations, 9 Emmy Awards, 8 Oscar nominations, 3 Oscar Awards, countless Golden Globe, SAG, and other award nominations, and winners, 6 next generation superstars, 2 Stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and of course, 1 real, live, Knight of the Queen of England. My guess is you would be hard pressed to find a more heralded cast in another film.

So, with this much fire power, you would think we were going to be seeing the biggest blockbuster of the season. Well, boy was I in for a surprise. This movie, which should have been something special, was one big pile of poo. Thats right folks, this movie stunk. Why you ask? Well let me tell you. First off, the movie has very little to do with Bobby Kennedy. Instead, we get to follow a whole bunch of characters throughout the day and location of Senator Kennedy's murder. Now, don't get me wrong. That alone did not make the movie the pile of poo it is. Nope, there was more. Had the audience been given a chance to make a connection with any of the characters the movie followed, it may have been a good movie, but in the 2 hour time frame, Emilio tried to shove too many stories into not enough time. What I mean is had we been able to bond with the war dodging newlyweds, or the baseball loving busboy, or the maritally challenged hotel manager and his cosmetologist wife, or the LSD using campaign volunteers, or the drunkard fading star and her doormat of a husband... we may have cared more about what transpires to them all at the end. We may have felt what they felt when they witnessed Senator Kennedy get shot. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. Instead, we got infinitesimally small glimpses into their lives, and rather than bond with them, we are left wondering, "What the fuck was the point of Helen Hunt and Charlie Sheen anyhow?"

Because we never really meet Bobby Kennedy in the film (Estevez did not cast anyone as Bobby, but instead used old footage and speeches of Kennedy to represent his existence, which could have been powerful, but instead was disjointed) we never really feel lose when he is killed. We never hear about why he was killed. We never meet Sirhan Sirhan in the movie (in fact his name was never even mentioned) so we never get any answers or theories into why Senator Kennedy was assassinated. Because we never really get to know any of the characters, we never feel for them or with them either.

Unfortunately, what could have been an awesomely powerful movie with truly an all-star cast, instead becomes an also ran in this years holiday season. And instead of leaving the theater energized, and excited for the movie season to come, I left wondering "So how bout that Tim Allen flick?"

If you've seen the movie Bobby, go ahead, sound off. I can't wait to hear your Abstract.